Emotional First Aid

If I’m overwhelmed, the quickest way that I find relief is by using my body. After I’m calm enough, I can then work with the mind.

For a video version of these steps, see: http://tiny.cc/copingskills1

Somatic Hold – Put one hand over your heart and another over your stomach. Begin to rock back and forth.
Breathwork - Notice your breathing pattern. As you exhale, try extending it as long as possible. On another exhale, try saying the word “vooooo” throughout the whole exhale.
Bilateral Stimulation – Try a Butterfly Hug / Monkey Tap or another form of BLS.
Retreat – Use your Container or visit your SafePlace.
Movement – Sense into the body and see what movement feels good. If nothing comes to you, experiment with walking, jogging, running in place; shaking, or jumping. Try the woodchopper.
Vagus Nerve – Use the “Basic” Vagus Nerve Exercise (Video)

Set the intention — overwhelming thoughts and feelings aren’t random - they’re coming from parts. Set the intention for curiosity and open-heartedness.
Externalize — get a piece of paper out and draw out the part of you that is being overwhelmed. It doesn’t have to be “good” art.
Acknowledge — Try saying to yourself, “A part of me is overwhelmed and needs my help.”
Invitation — picture a young child or a teenager. Ask them, “Would you be willing to lower the intensity if I promised to stay with you?”
Core Fear — Ask the following questions to reveal the root thing the part is afraid of. Look for two common fears: “something bad is going to happen” or “I’m going to be alone.”
- “Can you tell me what you are worried about?”
- “If that really did happen, why would that be so bad? What else would you be worried about?”
- “And if that happened, what are they afraid would happen next?
Repair — Ask “What do you need me to know” and “What do you need from me—right here, right now in this exact moment—to feel a little bit safer?”
Connect — Reassure the part. If the part is interested, offer a Self-Hug. Hold yourself like you would a beloved pet, friend, or child who needs your love. Hugging yourself has been shown to release oxytocin, and relieve stress and pain.

Tips

Using a journal, write out your dialogues with your overwhelmed parts. Ask it what it needs you to know and write that out. Write out any questions you have for it as well as their answers.
If you can sit with the overwhelming emotions, you might paradoxically try asking the part to come even closer. “I’m strong and can support you. You have my permission to come closer and express whatever you need to. I am here to witness your pain.”

Friedrich Nietzsche

“Behind your thoughts and feelings, my brother, there is a mighty lord, an unknown sage - his name is self; he dwells in your body, he is your body. There is more reason in your body than in your best wisdom.”